Resolutions worth making…

It’s that time of year again: when we choose a list of resolutions that aim to improve our lives, once and for all. Invariably, they end up confirming our innate resistance to change. Worry no more! Here are my top 5 resolutions for the year 2008 (or 2009 or 2010…it doesn’t matter) that will end up succeeding and make me feel better!!

  1. I resolve to fail at completing at least one of my new year’s resolutions. (Note: if I keep them all, then I fail at this one, hence I kept it. It’s a paradox, so be careful to not be driving the car when you ponder it…)
  2. I resolve to get pissed at least once this year (Let’s start with the easy ones!)
  3. I resolve to stay in more and avoid walking, cycling, or unnecessarily straining my body.
  4. I resolve to get severely annoyed at one of the following this year: organised religion, politicians, the M50 motorway, advertising, or spam.
  5. I resolve to completely forget about these resolutions by February.

There. I feel better already. No more impossible resolutions. As Homer says: “It’s not the taking part that counts, it’s drinking the beer afterwards.” 

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1 Comment

  1. David said,

    January 5, 2008 at 12:31 am

    This resolution package looks to be pretty airtight! Good job shazgood! Happy New Year!


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